Liam Wants a Change
Life with Liam has been getting progressively worse. He is becoming more angry and volatile as the days go by. He is failing two classes in school and three of his teachers have been in contact with me about his grades and attitude in class. Apparently, the meds he is taking for the depression are not helping so we have another appointment scheduled to talk to his doctor. Liam is adamant that he doesn’t want to take the meds during the summer since he won’t be in school and he attributes everything negative to school.
Liam told me the other day that he is thinking of moving in with his dad. I told him that we need to sit with his counselor and talk to her about it because he needs to fully understand his options. I want to do it with his counselor because they have a good relationship and she will help him understand the pros and cons of each option. I’m not opposed to him going to live with Bubba but I am opposed to him doing it without information.
We sat down with his counselor and together we told him what the pros and cons of living with me are. We asked if he could think of any more to add to the list. Then we did the same thing with Bubba. I told Liam not to make a decision yet as we had time for him to really think about what he wanted. I told him I would support him no matter what he choose. We scheduled another appointment with his counselor for the following week. To say it was a stressful week would be a gross understatement.
When we had the next appointment, he said that he’d decided to stay with me. I asked him why and he said because he knew that if he decided to move with his dad, we’d have to fight in the courts again and he didn’t want to put me through that. I assured him that if he truly wants to live with his dad, I would move heaven and earth to make it happen because it is what he wants. I told him not to worry about the hows of it because that was for me to do. He insisted again that he would remain with me.
Since he had decided to stay, we once again went over the expectations for him. We covered the rules of the house and that he needed to abide by them. We talked about what he needed to do to recover from having failed two classes. He said he understood and that he agreed to the rules.
I left the appointment feeling very off about the whole thing. It is so obvious to me that Liam is severely depressed but I can’t force him to take meds or participate in therapy. I have to work with him to show him a better way and to try to guide him along a path to health. I had a strange feeling that it would only be a matter of time before the police would have to get involved again because his violence was escalating and I was scared. I was very worried for my precious baby boy and how much hurt he had inside him.
Yet I felt powerless to help him.