Making Progress

Today’s conversation:

Treun: So, I’ve told everyone except Melanie about our plans. I’ve told my folks and both of my sons. I haven’t told Melanie yet because she’ll be the most sensitive about it.
Me: Oh which plans? Fixing up the house?
Treun: Our future together plans. We just have to decide whether we’re going to make it official in May before the boys leave or in August when they get back.

Interesting conversation.  He’s back from his business trip.  He spent a lot of time with his folks and apparently he told them all about everything.  He has a close relationship with them and considers his dad one of his closest friends.  He’s told his sons but not his daughter.  I wonder how she’ll react.  I guess he’ll tell her eventually.

We’ve come a long way.  A few months ago I doubted that he’d ever want to marry me and now we’re trying to decide when would be best to make it official.  Only it is very hard to do that when he hasn’t even asked me yet!  I don’t know what he’s waiting for.  I think maybe he wanted to tell his parents before he asked me.  He’s been home for a couple of days and he just told me he’s told everyone except Melanie.

He has a plan.  One thing I’ve learned about Treun is that he is a planner.  He knows exactly when he’s going to ask me and make it official, he just hasn’t let me in on the plan yet.

So while I wait for him to ask me to marry him, we continue on making plans for once we’re married.  The one thing that struck me about this is that most couples make such a hoopla about the wedding and don’t put much thought into the marriage that results from that wedding.  I was guilty of it with Bubba.  Our focus was on the party but we really didn’t discuss how things would run when we were actually married.  I’d like to think that some of his crazy might’ve showed if we’d talked about things before the wedding.

This time around is different.  The wedding itself is almost an afterthought – just something we have to get through.  We’re talking about the future.  He’s shown me his finances, I know what he has coming in and going out.  I know what his financial responsibilities are.  He knows mine.  We’ve discussed parenting and what his role is in regards to my kids.  We talk about things that matter from our views and beliefs to conflict resolution and what to do when we don’t agree.

We’re preparing for the future.  I just wonder when he’s going to make it official and ask me!

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