Blown Away

I got home for lunch and Sean’s girlfriend’s car was in their driveway again.  I liked it better when he was just gone.  After seeing him the other day with his girlfriend over there, I noticed that his truck was back for a little bit that evening.  Then today he was outside again.  He really has lost weight.  I recognized the jeans he was wearing and they aren’t hugging his butt like they used to.  I hate that my heart breaks all over again when I see him.

I got back to work and started walking across the parking lot.  I work for a large company and always end up parking toward the back of the lot.  As I was walking in today, I noticed a man matching steps with me.  I looked over at him and we started talking.  We talked the entire way across the parking lot.  Finally, I said, “My name is Hope.”  He introduced himself with just his first name.  Duh!  Had I said my last name, he might have given his.  Instead I told him where I worked and when he veered off to walk in another direction, I got bold enough to ask where he worked.  He is in a completely different area of the company.

When I got back into my office, I told two of the ladies and they told me to look him up on the company directory.  Since I had a few minutes left of my lunch break, I did just that.  I found him!  He is so handsome!  I wish I could’ve seen his left hand to get an idea of whether he is married or not.  I still can’t believe that I talked to an unknown man and enjoyed it!  That still just amazes me that I no longer shrink and try to hide myself from men.

While I was home for lunch, I decided to check out the dating website.  I found a new man on there and his profile totally blew me away!  He knows what Love Languages are!!!  Everything he wants in a relationship is what I’ve been looking for.  I emailed him a quick hello and said I’d write more after work.  Not only is his profile wonderful, he’s rather easy on the eyes.  He is definitely swoon-worthy!

I got home from work and emailed him again like I said I would.  I really hope he responds.  I would love to get to know him.

Getting over Sean is hard but I’m enjoying meeting new people.  I am praying that I find my other half, the man I’m meant to be with.  I might not be totally on board with marriage yet, but I definitely want a relationship with someone.  I want someone to come home to in the evenings.  I want someone to love.

I really do hope this man emails back.  Right now I’m trying not to obsessively check the site.

It really isn’t working.

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