I do not know what is up with today but I think I’ve had every difficult question at work this morning. I have so much to do and no time to do it. My boss said I could work overtime anytime I needed to. I need to; I just can’t this week.
Today I get my car back from the shop. They are finally done with it after having been in a wreck. I need to do that right after work and then get home to make dinner.
Let’s discuss dinner. I’d planned to make something in the crock pot. I got home at lunch and saw the crock pot sitting on the stove. I’d forgotten to actually put anything in it except for one ingredient. I now have to throw that away. I’m so disgusted! I just got busy this morning with getting ready for work, fixing Shane breakfast, getting Liam out the door, and just doing the general morning rituals. I know I’m being hard on myself for forgetting to finish putting food in the crockpot, but I realize I tend to beat myself up still. I guess since Bubba isn’t here to do it for me, I do it for myself. I need to stop and I’m working on it.
It’s just been a supremely bad day. I think what makes it so bad is that I’m feeeeeeeeeeling all the feelings. There they are, just like they should be in a normal person who has feelings. Only, I’m not used to them. They still tend to freak me out a little. I’m stressed, I’m still hurting about Sean, everything seems difficult today. I’m just feeling an overwhelming amount of emotions.
Today is a terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad day. I do not want to go to Australia though; I want to go to Fiji.