Monthly Archives: February, 2013

The Apology

After my walk, I wanted to apologize to Sean.  He deserved an apology because I really had been cold on Christmas Eve.  I’d also been a bit of a bitch.  I texted and asked if I could come over to apologize and he told me in a little bit.  He finally got back to me …

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The Party and The Great Big Realization

The children and I went to the party at Sean’s Mom’s house.  When I got there, I said hi to Sean and he barely acknowledged me.  I figured that I’d just stay out of his way and have fun socializing with everyone else.  Sara and I spent a large portion of the evening together.  She’s …

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I Told Him

Sean popped in last night.  We had a few minutes alone and I told him that I am not willing to try a relationship.  It is either Friends With Benefits (FWB) or nothing.  I’m not willing to budge, he’s not willing to budge.  We find ourselves at an impasse.  It thoroughly sucks.  I told him …

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I’m a Coward A.K.A. It’s Time to Cut and Run

I called Sean last night to see if he wanted to watch a movie. He said there was a football game starting in an hour that he wanted to watch, so I asked him if he wanted to come over to talk.  He told me he’d come over at 8:00.  I decided to not hold …

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The Shit Hit the Fan

Sean and I sneaked out to the laundry room to talk a couple nights ago after the boys went to sleep.  We’d talked previously about our relationship getting complicated and I needed to define what was happening.  I’d spent a lot of time thinking about what I want.  I want to remain friends and I …

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Body Recall

Since things are getting hot and heavy with Sean, I decided to go back into research mode.  For some reason, being with Luke was so very different.  I trusted him completely and the issues that Bubba caused didn’t enter the picture except when we tried a possibly triggery position.  Even then I was able to …

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How Did I Not See This?

I’ve been going over and over this in my head.  How did I not see what is happening with Sean coming a mile away?  I’m starting to think I was so far into denial that there was no possibility of seeing it.  I look back now and see the danger signs. About two weeks after …

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Danger, Will Robinson!!!!!

Sean and I decided that we needed to talk.  He’d said we need to go slowly or things were going to get complicated.  I told him things already were complicated.  We decided to take a walk and talk after I got Shane to bed.  Since my brain shuts down when he’s within 5 feet of …

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Getting in Deeper and Deeper

Arcadia and I went to see a musical at a local church last night.  Afterward, we went to a friend’s house for a get-together.  We had a really nice time.  The host of the party asked if I’d like a drink so I asked Arcadia if she would mind driving home.  She said she didn’t …

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Disappearing Acts and Zings

I’d asked Sean to watch a movie with me Friday night.  I’d texted a few times Thursday and he didn’t answer any of them.  Finally, Friday afternoon he texted.  He said he thought he’d be over to watch the movie and he’d let me know by 5.  I knew, just knew, that it wasn’t going …

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