Our Wal-Mart Trip
Luke and I had Hannah over for burgers one afternoon. I made a chocolate cake. I had to melt a tablespoon of butter so I got out a small skillet and melted it. I casually mentioned that the only thing I really didn’t like about not having a microwave was melting butter. Hannah agreed since she doesn’t have a microwave either. We laughed about it because we always say this to each other. Since I bake so much and Hannah is here so much, she hears me lament this fact often.
Luke and I went to the lake the next day. When we got there, no one else was there. It was so peaceful and quiet. There is something about being at the lake that touches me deeply. When we got there, he went up to use the bathroom, so I just stood in the water and felt another piece of my soul heal. I think I need to be in nature to revive my spirit (but that is another post). We swam around, we talked, I freaked out because I kept feeling things skittering over my feet! We were in the water for about an hour. Then we stood around his truck (he checked his work emails while we chatted) and waited for his clothes to dry a bit since he didn’t bring anything to change into.
One the way back, I asked him if we could stop at the library because I had a book to pick up and it was on the way. I told him we’d turn left right after Wal-Mart. He asked where Wal-Mart was and I told him it was right down the road. He plugged it in to his GPS and laughed when it said Wal-Mart was over 4 miles away. I guess he doesn’t think 4 miles is “right down the road.” He said we were going to stop because he needed a few things for his truck.
We got into the store and he headed to the housewares department. I kept pointing to the back corner and telling him that automotive was back there. He turned down the aisle where the microwaves are. He grabbed one and I told him I didn’t need it. He wouldn’t listen. He was bound and determined to buy me a microwave. When I told him again that I didn’t need it, he insisted that I did need it to melt butter. I even tried to get between him and the cart to stop him from pushing it away. He just kissed me and started walking.
Then he found glasses and picked up a 4-pack of small glasses. He said I needed those too. I told him I had nowhere to keep them and that I didn’t really need them. Since I had wanted to taste the whiskey he’d bought the day he got here and only had big drinking glasses, he said I needed small drinking glasses.
Then he headed for the towels. He insisted that I needed a bath sheet. I’d told him the story of microwaving my towels in the past to heat them up. I learned not to heat up bath sheets because I tried it once and since it was so large, the turntable couldn’t turn and I burned a huge hole right down through the towel. He told me I needed a new bath sheet since I went all nuclear on my other one. He ended up buying two. When I protested, he told me to just accept it or he’d buy two more so that each of the kids could have their own. The man knows how to negotiate!
He actually did buy one thing for himself. He bought a small cooler since his large one had been leaking.
While he was looking at coolers, I had to walk into the next aisle over to talk myself out of crying. It was so sweet of him to get those things for me. I’m not used to a man being sweet, doing nice things for me, and expecting nothing in return. I wasn’t made to “pay” for it.
We got back to my house and he unpacked the microwave and we got it put up on the counter. He then turned to me and said, “There! Now you can melt all the butter you want.” He was grinning while he said it. He’s such a tease.
Having had that experience, I realized that I have trouble accepting gifts. From my past, I know that gifts are not free. They come with price tags, usually very large price tags. Luke not only helped me heal sexually, he helped me heal emotionally. He showed me that gifts can simply be gifts. He expected no payment of any sort for the things he bought me and he’s never thrown them in my face.
Each and every time I use my microwave now, I think of Luke. I think of our time together. I think of that wicked grin he gave me when we plugged in the microwave for the first time.
And my heart soars.