Monthly Archives: December, 2012

I Hate Down Days

It’s one of those days.  It’s a Bad Day.  A very big, bad day. I’m having very big feelings and most of them aren’t rational.  I absolutely *know* they aren’t rational yet there they are.  One thing I’ve learned is that no matter if they make sense or not, I have to feel these feelings. …

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Offending Those I Love

Along with yesterday’s post about Boundary Setting, I also had to learn to take people at their word.  I’d learned my lesson early to always put everyone’s needs over and above my own.  Once I was free from Bubba, I started to learn (thanks in large part to Liz, my therapist) that my needs were important …

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Waiting For The Sun

Endellion and I got drunk last night.   Although we are physically separated by quite a few states, we often chat and video chat on Skype.  We like to drink together because usually, we giggle our asses off and have a blast. Last night we cried harder than we normally laugh, at least Endellion did. …

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Boundary Setting

When I first left Bubba, I set a boundary that I would only communicate with him via email and only about the children.  I explained to him that I needed time to think.  At that point he was admitting to the abuse, he said he was going to change, and he was talking about finding …

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He Was Sadistic

I’m reading an article about orgasms right now.  As I was writing my last post, I started wondering how often women actually orgasm during sex.  I’ve heard that it isn’t as often as one would think.  From what I’m reading, intercourse only sex rarely produces orgasms.  Usually it is intercourse plus something else that results …

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The Aftermath

WARNING:  This gets graphic too! Luke left Friday morning. Watching him drive away ripped my heart out. I wasn’t ready to let him go yet. I was stunned to discover that I didn’t even have time to be sad at his leaving or to sit and just roll around in the memories of his visit. …

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Our Wal-Mart Trip

Luke and I had Hannah over for burgers one afternoon.  I made a chocolate cake.  I had to melt a tablespoon of butter so I got out a small skillet and melted it.  I casually mentioned that the only thing I really didn’t like about not having a microwave was melting butter.  Hannah agreed since …

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Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas! May you all be enjoying the peace and freedom of this very special day! Love, Hope

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Processing Luke’s Visit

WARNING:  This gets graphic. Luke and I had just sixty hours together.  We went to the lake, grilled burgers with Hannah, walked along the river together, and went out to eat for dinner (I got to wear my awesome, sexy dress and stilettos).  We also had sex. I used to have this idea that “having …

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Healing is Amazing!

Luke arrived around 5:30 pm.  I went out to the car and we hugged.  It felt so good to have my arms around him.  I helped him get his stuff into the house.  We got everything situated and he noticed the pull-up bar that Serenity has in the doorway between the hallway and living room. …

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